WARNING: This is one of my "I'm slightly pissed off so I figured I'd blog about it to release some frustration" blogs. So if you don't want to read anything like that... you should probably close this tab now.
I have a lot of pet peeves. Calling me by my last name is a pet peeve of mine. Being a hypocrite is a pet peeve of mine. Not following through on promises you make is a pet peeve of mine (it's a policy of mine to automatically be annoyed by any and all politicians).
The one pet peeve of mine I wanted to talk about, though, is people who try and successfully pull off what I like to call "one sided friendships." I think that it's within the realm of possibility that I could write a book on how much one sided friendships make my blood boil. If I could rate it on a scale of 1-10 for how much they make me mad, I'd rate them at a 19398293. True story, bro. If one sided friendships were a person, they'd be the ugly red-headed step child that nobody ever really wanted. If they were a day they'd be Mondays. Specifically Monday mornings. FACT: Mondays are notorious for being the day that heart attacks most frequent. Does that put it into perspective for you? I really hate one sided friendships. Like... if I could turn them into a person I would probably murder that person. But I wouldn't get in trouble. It would be labeled as justifiable homicide.
Maybe I'm just going about life all wrong, but I seem to encounter one sided friendships a lot. Usually I end them before they have the chance to begin. However I'm a firm believer that if you are going to be "friends" with someone, the feeling should be mutual. As in both of you should probably put in an effort to be friends. That's where the term "one sided" comes into account.
I will admit I am probably guilty at being the bad friend in a one sided friendship. A lot. This is me giving you permission to call me out on it. It is absolutely not fair to anyone to be in this situation.
However I also know that I have been and still am the person that is putting the effort into a one sided friendship. It freaking sucks. It's kind of like you'd jump in front of a bullet for that person without hesitation. But if it came down to them jumping in front of a bullet for YOU, you're not entirely sure they'd do it. If you're in that situation...
Signs you're the victim of a one sided friendship:
- You always have to start the conversation.
- If you want to hang out with that person, YOU have to ask THEM to hang out. They never ask you to hang out.
- You always seem to be giving the effort to maintain the relationship. The amount of effort put forth by the other person: goose egg.
If this applies to you, I'm sorry. Together we can find a cure. If you just realized that you're the douche bag in a one sided friendship... freaking fix it or stop leading that person on. Friendships aren't a light switch you can just flip on and off. If you were real friends, you'd go through some tough shit together. Not bail out when it gets tough, and them come waltzing back when the tough part is over.
In regards to the other end of my one sided friendship... 1. I hope you know who you are. 2. I hope you're reading this. 3. If you are reading this, we need to talk. 4. If you're not sure if it's about you, please ask. Because I do want to talk to you about it. Badly. To the point that it kinda hurts.